Wine Glass With Sayings — 87% Wine, 13% Poor Decisions, 0% Regret

The Math Checks Out

Somewhere around the second pour on a Friday, a household quits pretending it is running an experiment and starts reading the label. This glass is the label. CONTENTS sits across the top the way it would on a nutrition panel, and underneath comes the honest breakdown: 87% WINE, 13% POOR DECISIONS, and — ruled off below like a sum — 0% REGRET.

All three figures are engraved at the same size on purpose. It reads as an equation rather than a stack of punchlines, so the eye adds the column and lands on the total. That is the whole gag, and it is a dry one: the poor decisions are fully accounted for, and the ledger still comes out clean.

Wine glass sayings that do not wear off

Nearly every clever glass on a gift-shop shelf is printed. The ink sits on top of the surface, and it leaves the same way it arrived — two dishwasher cycles later the words are a peeling ghost and the glass quietly relocates to the donate box. This one is laser-engraved instead. Each letter is cut into the glass as permanent frost you can feel with a thumb, so the saying outlasts the season, the apartment, and in most cases the decision that earned the 13%.

• 11.5 oz stemless wine glass with a heavy base
• Permanent deep-frost laser engraving — never printed, never peels
• Ships free, made to order in 2–7 business days
• Top-rack dishwasher safe (hand wash recommended)
• No personalization required — ships exactly as shown

Good as a pair, better as a set of six

Because nothing on this glass is personalized, it is the rare funny gift that scales. Two of them turn a housewarming into a house joke on day one. Six of them cover a book club, a bunco night, a bridal-shower table, or the office gift exchange, and every one is identical — no spellings to collect, no wrong-name disaster, no waiting on a proof. It is also the safe pick when you are guessing at someone's taste: the humor is dry rather than loud, and nothing on it assumes a thing about who is drinking. If you would rather the gift carry their name than the joke, our Engraved Stemless Wine Glass puts a family name and est. year on the same 11.5 oz bowl — the two sit well side by side on the same bar cart.