Funny Desk Decor — Askhole Definition Carved Wood Sign
FREE shipping — cut, carved, stained & sealed by hand in our Kentucky workshop, ships in 2–7 business days
Built from scratch, one order at a time — claim your spot on the workbench today
Funny Desk Decor for Everyone Who Knows an Askhole
Askhole, noun: a person who constantly asks for your advice and then does the exact opposite. If a name just came to mind, this carved piece of funny desk decor is for you — the full dictionary entry, CNC-carved into solid Kentucky wood and sized to sit right where the consultations happen.
A Definition That Sticks
Office humor usually arrives as a mug that chips or a print that fades under fluorescent lights. This one is carved — letters cut deep into solid pine or poplar, hand-stained in one of twenty finishes from boardroom walnut to break-room bright. The definition stays crisp for as long as the askholes keep asking.
Recommended Consulting Locations
- Desk or credenza — small size sits perfectly beside the monitor
- Home office wall — visible on every advice-seeking video call
- Cubicle shelf — a public service announcement
- Therapist or manager's office — professionally relevant
The Specs
- Solid locally-sourced pine or poplar — never MDF
- Three sizes: Small 16" x 3.5", Classic 24" x 5.5", Bold 30" x 7.5"
- 20 hand-applied stain and paint finishes
- CNC-carved lettering — never printed, never vinyl
- Sawtooth hanger pre-installed; handmade in Kentucky, free U.S. shipping
The Office Gift That Names Names (Quietly)
Secret Santa, work anniversaries, the coworker who survived another reorg, the friend whose advice is excellent and ignored — this is the sarcastic desk piece that gets photographed for the group chat. Three sizes, twenty hand-applied finishes, free U.S. shipping, hanger pre-installed for wall duty. Browse our other funny office signs and finish the workspace properly.
The Teamwork Makes the Dream Work Sign is the natural companion to this one.
Funny Desk Decor — Askhole Definition Carved Wood Sign
Real Wood. Real Craft.
Here's what makes every sign different from the vinyl stuff you'll find in big box stores.
V-Carved, Not Vinyl
The letters are literally cut into the wood with a CNC machine. Real depth, real shadows, no peeling.
Handmade in Kentucky
Every sign is cut, carved, stained, and sealed by hand in our Rineyville, Kentucky workshop.
5,000+ 5-Star Reviews
Real photos from real customers. Our signs are hanging in homes from Oregon to Maine.
Size Comparison
All three sizes shown at actual scale so you can see the real difference.
Large
30" × 7.25"
Medium
24" × 5.5"
Small
16" × 3.5"
Large
30" × 7.25"
Over couches, chairs, or mantles — a real statement piece
Medium
24" × 5.5"
Above doors, over coffee bars, or as a kitchen accent
Small
16" × 3.5"
Shelf sitter, desk accent, or small wall decor piece
All sizes shown at the same scale. Not sure which to pick? Medium is our most popular choice.