{"product_id":"funny-neighbor-sign-our-neighbors-have-better-stuff","title":"Funny Neighbor Sign — Our Neighbors Have Better Stuff","description":"\u003ch2\u003eRedirecting Trouble Next Door Since Day One\u003c\/h2\u003e\u003cp\u003eA carved funny neighbor sign that solves the problem by passing it along. Our neighbors have better stuff — ROB THEM. Script on the first line, block capitals on the second, so the punchline lands exactly where it should. Best hung where the neighbors can read it too.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eCut Into the Wood, Not Printed On It\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eThe letters are CNC-carved down through the stain into raw pine, so what you are reading is actual depth, not ink. Run a thumb across it. That pale-against-dark contrast is why it still reads across a dim room, and why it will not chip, peel, fade or bubble the way printed decor does by year two.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003ch3\u003eWhere It Ends Up\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eFront porch\u003c\/strong\u003e — in full view of next door\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eEntryway\u003c\/strong\u003e — the first laugh of the visit\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eGarage\u003c\/strong\u003e — above the bench\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDen or bar\u003c\/strong\u003e — among the other opinions\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eThe Specs\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSolid locally-sourced pine or poplar from an Amish mill — never MDF\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eThree sizes: Small 16\" x 3.5\", Medium 24\" x 5.5\", Large 30\" x 7.25\"\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e20 hand-applied stain and paint finishes\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eCNC-carved lettering — never printed, never vinyl, never a decal\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003eSawtooth hanger pre-installed; handmade in Kentucky, free U.S. shipping\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e\u003ch3\u003eFor The Street With Good Neighbors\u003c\/h3\u003e\u003cp\u003eHousewarmings, block parties, anyone who has the kind of neighbors who would find it funny. Deep dark walnut with pale carved letters. 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